Introverts. We’re often a misunderstood breed. We tend to be observers. We’re not necessarily shy, but often shy away from heavy social interaction. It’s not that we don’t like people, we just need a respite after being around them.
We’ll come to your party – especially if we really like you. We might not like the party, but hey – we’re there.
So, if you love your introvert friends, it would be good for you to know a few things we really DON’T want to do at your party. Seriously, please don’t make us.
Please please don’t announce that we’re “up next.” Don’t call us up on stage with you or pull our arm and drag us up with you. We’re not huge fans of making fools of ourselves or being put on the spot. As much as I love you, I don’t have any desire to sing “Islands in the Stream” with you. Thanks anyways. You’ll just have to “Get Jiggy With It’ on your own.
2. Play Charades
No. I will not act out “Top Gun” or flap my arms like a chicken in front of all of your friends. I draw the line at pretending to be Arnold Schwarzenegger. It’s just not going to happen. I”m happy to sit on the couch and Instagram you pretending to be the Terminator though…
3. Get Stuck On the Couch With That “One Friend” Everyone Has
We all have “that one friend.” He/She really likes to talk. A lot. So much talking. Mostly about themselves or some uber-specific subject the general population knows very little about. Here’s the thing – we don’t like small talk – with anyone – especially people who don’t give you a natural “out” or allow you to get up from the couch without following you to the restroom. Please don’t leave us alone with them. We beg you.
I don’t want to do the funky chicken, the macarena, or any other outdated group dance. (No, not even Thriller. And no, not even though it was adorable in 13 Going on 30.) I don’t find it charming when you drag me onto the floor promising “it will be fun.” It won’t be. Not for me.
Seriously. I’m not having a bad time hanging out against the wall. I’m not upset. I’m not brooding. I might get upset if you make me start to mingle with a bunch of people I don’t know. Let us be. Wallflowers are pretty. Your party needs some.
6. Ice Breakers
Unless you’re sending us into the kitchen to literally break up a block of ice, chances are most introverts aren’t going to be too keen with your garden variety party “ice breakers.” Simply talking to people drains our energy – so talking to people with post-its taped to our head is only that much more exhausting.
7. Have the Host Leave the Room for Extended Periods of Time
I know, I know. I already mentioned that we don’t want to get stuck next to “that guy.” But, we also don’t want to be left for long periods of time. If you’re the only person we know well, and you decide to say – give a group of people a tour of your home or go show a buddy your new video game, fancy wine cellar, or guitar – please don’t leave us. I mean, go to the bathroom and re-fill the chip bowl, but please don’t ditch us.
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