Maybe you’ve been carrying yours around for the last ten years…..Maybe you just picked yours up yesterday. I’ve had mine for about two weeks….and today, we all need to let them go. (And, I mean REALLY let them go.) It’s time to drop our feelings of bitterness, resentment, and the hope that “they” will say they’re sorry. It’s time to drop the baggage we allow ourselves to haul around when someone has hurt us.
Think to yourself, how many times you’ve replayed what happened over and over in your head….How many times have you let their words ring in your ears? Do you keep rehearsing for a conversation you’re never going to have? Have you imagined your enemy getting hit by the Karma Truck? My guess is that you’re probably doing all of these things…and probably more often than you want to truly admit….Let’s face it…we’re easily wounded.
When someone hurts us, the most obvious reaction is not to let go. Instead, we do the opposite, focusing all of our thoughts and energy on the pain this person has caused….and they win again. Every time we rewind what happened in our minds, we are allowing that person who hurt us to yet again re-gain control over us. We sit and stew….allowing all of our negativity, justifications, rebuttals, and pain simmer….constantly churning inside of us. We may have a good day…a good morning…a good hour…where we don’t think about what happened, and then something will trigger a reminder, and we’ve jumped down the rabbit hole of pain again. Frankly, I want to get out of the hole.
I know that what happened to you probably wasn’t fair, wasn’t something you planned for, expected, or ever wanted to live through. Trust me….I know. I know that the person who did this to you wasn’t right. I also know, that reliving it everyday, and rehashing what happened over and over in your head, isn’t going to change what happened. You can’t take back what they did. The past cannot be undone….no matter how unfair the past may be.
“Well, everyone I know has a got a reason, to say, put the past away. I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend. Cut ties of all the lies that you’ve been living in.” (Who knew Third Eye Blind was so darn wise?)
Get off the proverbial balcony and let it go. Stop going over what happened and imagining other scenarios…Stop wondering what would have happened IF….Stop handing your control, mental health, and happiness over to this other person…..And you have to stop waiting for an apology….waiting for them to change their mind…to take back their words….to un-do whatever it is that they did…give it up. Let it go.
I know just how hard this is….I get caught up in the injustice of the hurt I’m dealing with every time I let myself….I dwell on the repercussions and effects this person’s actions/words will have….It’s very easy to let our wounds consume us…..especially when we didn’t deserve them. But, I can’t change what she did or said and the last thing I want is to have her take up residence inside my head. I refuse to let her have one more minute of my happiness, and will not allow her wrong choice to break me. She doesn’t get to win.
Don’t let whoever hurt you take control over you. We are strong. We can and WILL get through this, and their garbage will not be an active participant in our life any longer. We’re letting it go. We’re giving up all hopes of an apology, and recognizing that H.G. Wells will not be showing up with his time machine any time soon. It happened. It hurt. Move on. Don’t let your joy die another day. Don’t let the past destroy your future. That thing they did….it won’t break you. Don’t let it. Let it go.
I can’t think of a better way to end this post, than with the musical genius of the Newsboys. I invite you to play this video, listen to the song, and read they lyrics listed below.
You are waiting on a beach
For a healing word to come
Maybe an apology in a bottle
Maybe a flare that says, “I’m sorry.”
And the hurting leaves you numb
Will you forgive?
Will you forget?
Will you live what you know?
He left his rights
Will you leave yours?
You don’t understand it
Let it go
You are waiting on a beach
This is where the east meets west
And as another sun sets on your anger
The darkness laughs, as the wound destroys
And it turns your prayers to noise
Will you forgive?
Will you forget?
Will you live what you know?
He left his rights
Will you leave yours?
You won’t understand it
Let it go
This bitterness you hide
It seeps into your soul
And it steals your joy
’til it’s all you know
Let it go
Will you forgive?
Will you forget?
Will you live what you know?
He left his rights
Will you leave yours?
You won’t understand it
Let it go
Will you forgive?
Will you forget?
Will you live what you know?
Beneath the cross
You hear His words,
“Father, forgive them,”
And you know
You can’t understand it
Let it go
I also know, that for me, music is a powerful healing agent….I’ve gotten through most of the hardships and trials I’ve gone through with a heck of a lot of prayer, the Word, and belting out some lyrics I identify with. Here are a few other songs to help you keep going, find your inner strength, and let the one who hurt you go. You ARE Titanium. Believe it. Own it. And don’t let them break your soul. Refuse. Take back your emotions, and kick them out of your head. Lay it down, and let it go.
1. Titanium by David Guetta (my personal favorite at the moment)
2. Part of Me by Katy Perry
3. Fighter by Christina Aguilera (I like the version by the cast of Glee)
4. Survivor/I Will Survive (another Glee mash-up…of course, you could go with the Destiny’s child version for Survivor, and I love Cake’s version of I Will Survive)
5. Tubthumping by Chumbawumba (yep, I went there….Hey, it helps! You ain’t NEVER gonna keep me down!)
*featured image by http://www.blueelephantphotography.com
So my mom forwards me an email and says “Your Auntie Marleny just sent this to me and I think you should read it.”
Might I add my mother never emails. When she does, it’s almost always some crazy “don’t break the chain or you’ll die in the next ten minutes” type spam that she forwards without commentary.
I don’t think she has any idea that you just interviewed me! PS the post is beautiful. You’re an amzing woman Bekki!
Monti Carlo
MasterChef 3
Now I’M the one who will get weepy here…I get excited when ANYONE wants to share something I’ve written, and to have this little connection happen…makes my day. Thank you so much.
What a beautiful reminder! I’m stopping by via Bloggy Moms Sunday hop and I am so glad I did. I wrote a similar post two years ago after a youth pastor at my church spoke on carrying burdens we weren’t meant to bear. He then had everyone grab a balloon and a marker, write a message on the balloon and physically let it go. That evening was liberating! Before that night I spent 10 months carrying the pain and the burden of a severed relationship with a close family member. I beat myself up with would’ve, could’ve, should’ve. That night I let it go and while I still don’t have a relationship with that family member (not by choice, I might add) I am able to enjoy freedom from the burden because I LET IT GO.
I’ve been missing her this week especially so I am sure this find was not a coincidence. Thank you for the reminder. I will sleep well having been reminded that I already let it go and it’s in God’s hands.
Thank you so much, and I am so glad this post brought you some encouragement/affirmation. God has led me to posts before as well, confirming for me things I needed to hear/re-learn, etc. How fun for me to find a comment from you this morning, as I JUST found you on Twitter last night! Thank-you for commenting Diana. Praying now for your situation.